My dearest people, one of us is in dire need of our help.
I've been on the phone with Michael (not real name used so as to protect his privacy) since yesterday and he is seriously in a deep mess. Please read the mail he sent in:
I am engaged to a very wonderful lady who I have been dating for over 5 years now.
Our white wedding ceremony is suppose to take place Saturday November 21st 2015 but this may not happen because of a certain situation beyond my control.
I am a young man from a very poor family working hard to make it in life while my fiancee comes from a well off background.
My fiancée lives in Lagos while I live in Delta state.
Sometime in 2013, we did our introduction after which she traveled to the UK for her masters program (sponsored by her parents) a week later.
Few days after she landed in the UK, trouble started. Her parents started advising her to ditch her engagement ring as she might not get favours from people if they notice she is engaged. This request was quite strange to both of us but she ignored their suggestion.
All through her stay in the UK, she was pestered not to even bother coming back to Nigeria and she should look for opportunities over there but she vehemently insisted she has someone in Nigeria she has promised to marry and won't do that to me.
After a long 1 year 5months of absence, she finally came back to Nigeria mid July this year.
The parents insisted she must travel again to further her education but this time she insisted only after she is married and this caused a big issue in their home.
I was abused, denigrated and vilified by the parents as they can't understand why she would want to settle down with me when she has the opportunity to meet "better" people abroad. This is strange as they initially accepted me with open hands and were supportive during my introduction ceremony.
It became apparent that they felt their daughter is now "bigger' than me because she had gotten her second degree from a foreign land while I am just an ordinary Bsc holder.
Notwithstanding all the pressures from her family, my woman insisted it is either me or nothing else and I was invited over for a discussion. They thought I knew nothing about their intentions as they insisted she doesn't tell me.
I came for the family discussion, and after it, the parents reluctantly agreed to our marriage on the condition she must be allowed to further her education.
I agreed with my fianceé that we will for now, do our registry and traditional wedding only so we can save cost as I was having some challenges with work lately. I work with a contracting firm but for some months now we are yet to do any job.
Behold, the parents insisted we must also wed in the church immediately. Ordinarily I don't have an issue with it but I did explain to my fianceé that I cannot afford to spend money on a 2-day event as it will raise the budget for the whole wedding astronomically.
She lives at the outskirts of Lagos and there is no way we can compress both traditional and church wedding to a one day event. But her parents insisted that it was either we did all the weddings now or none at all.
It is apparent all this was done to frustrate me to give up but each time I contemplate that I remember the sacrifice my fiancé has gone through for our sake.
The parents have left the whole financial burden of the wedding on me even though I have complained severally I cannot manage it alone and it has not been easy trying to meet up with our wedding date.
I have covered all the expenses for the traditional wedding which will take place on friday but I am yet to do anything for the white wedding.
I am frustrated and just feel like ending the whole drama but am scared of what I might put my fiancée through. I am so depressed, frustrated and cry myself to sleep every night knowing that it is beyond my power to do what it takes to have the white wedding done.
I have contemplated pulling off from the whole wedding but I know my fiancé will be so heartbroken and only God knows what might befall her as she is so emotional and is really banking on me to pull this off.
I feel I have failed her and am scared of what our future will be if I end things now that invitation cards are already shared. I am really in a terrible fix.
I am using this medium to appeal to kindhearted people to please come to my aid. I will appreciate any assistance that can be offered.
Fortunately, I have been able to pay for the reception hall and cover some minor areas but I desperately need help in the following areas:
Decoration of the event center
MC for the occassion
Photography and video
A car for the groom to church event and back to reception venue
In fact, any amount of assistance in this regard will be highly appreciated.
Please help save my wedding. It is just 10days away and if I don't get this help it may never come to pass. I am at a crossroad and only you and God can see me through.
I know this is a personal journey but find it in your heart to offer whatever assistance that you can muster.
Anyone who can assist in any of the above can contact Laila who will pass on the message to me.
May God richly bless you in advance as you offer prayers and assistance on our behalf.
Please dearest TILB readers, I join in this urgent appeal. Search your hearts, whatever it is you can contribute to make this second TILB wedding happen, please help us.